As working moms, we’re basically the CEOs of our own tiny empires. We plan, manage, and troubleshoot like pros. So, naturally, we love setting goals—because what’s a CEO without a strategy? But here’s the thing: Are your goals actually yours?
Too often, we set external goals based on what we think we should do, or what we see others achieving. We end up on the hamster wheel of endless to-do lists, feeling exhausted, and wondering why reaching that “milestone” doesn’t feel as fulfilling as we thought.
Let’s talk about setting goals that don’t just look good on paper but feel good in your soul.
The Balance: External vs. Internal Goals for Optimal Workplace Wellness
External goals are the ones everyone sees: that promotion, the 5K race, or finally mastering the art of packing lunches that aren’t 50% snacks. They’re great for giving us direction and showing us what’s possible. But if they’re not backed by an internal “why,” they lose meaning.
Internal goals are deeply personal. They’re about why you want that promotion (to challenge yourself, not to prove something), or why you want to run that 5K (to feel stronger, not just to post about it).
Why External Goals Alone Don't Cut It
Imagine chasing a goal that wasn’t really yours. Maybe it looked shiny on someone else’s highlight reel, or maybe it’s what society tells you a “good mom” or “successful woman” should do.
You finally reach it, and... nothing. No fireworks. Just exhaustion and an unsettling feeling of What now?
Find Your “Why” (And Make Sure It’s Yours)
Before setting your next goal, ask yourself:
Why do I want this? Is it for me, or to impress someone else?
What will it feel like when I achieve it? If the answer is “relief” instead of “joy,” reconsider.
Does it align with my values? If your goal conflicts with what really matters to you, you’ll struggle to stay motivated.
Working Mom Translation:
Think of it like signing up for a marathon. Is it because you love running, or because Karen from PTA said she’s doing one? Goals should energize you, not drain you before you even start.
Tips for Setting Balanced Goals:
Mix Internal with External:Pair that external goal (like a job promotion) with an internal one (like gaining confidence in your leadership skills).
Ditch the Comparison Game:Just because your coworker’s goal is to work 60-hour weeks doesn’t mean yours has to be. (Unless that’s your idea of fun—then carry on! 😅)
Make Room for Small Wins:Sometimes, the best goals are simple: “Drink my coffee while it’s hot” is a valid internal goal, and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
The Bottom Line: Goals Should Feel Good
Set goals that excite you. Ones that make you want to get out of bed (even if it’s at 5 a.m. because the toddler had a nightmare). When your goals are balanced between external achievement and internal fulfillment, success feels like your success—not just another item checked off the list.
Now go set some goals, mama. And make sure they’re yours. 🌟
Ready to Break the Cycle?
If you’re ready to stop the cycle of quick fixes and start living with intention, I’d love to invite you to join UNLEASHED Essentials—my membership program designed to help you dig deeper, overcome burnout, and unleash your full potential. It’s like having a roadmap to finally address the root causes of stress and frustration so you can thrive in every area of your life.
It’s my membership program designed to help you dig deeper, break the cycle of quick fixes, and create a life that feels aligned, empowered, and joyful. Think of it as your roadmap for moving past burnout and finally silencing those feelings of stress and self-doubt.
This is your chance to stop bandaid-fixing your challenges and start building a life that feels aligned, empowered, and joyful.
How to Join:
Visit UNLEASHED Essentials.
Start transforming your life today.
Let’s make this the year we stop rushing through life and start embracing the exhilaration of moving with intention. The transformation you’ve been waiting for is just one shift in mindset away. Will you take that step?
P.S. Want to see a sneak peak of what's waiting for you on the other side of saying yes to choosing you for only less than 10 minutes a day?
About the Author
Hi, I’m Phallyn—a corporate veteran turned entrepreneur, certified Feng Shui & hypnotherapy expert, and working mom with over a decade of experience navigating high-pressure environments. After experiencing burnout and anxiety firsthand, I transformed my life using holistic practices and a commitment to intentional living. Now, I’m passionate about helping women, especially working moms in male-dominated industries, overcome stress and create balanced, fulfilling lives. Through humor, honesty, and actionable insights, I aim to empower others to stop surviving and start thriving.
Let’s create a life that feels as good as it looks! 🥂
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